Hell, Heaven, and Earth In A Week Part 3:The Conclusion

   I'm not even sure what time I woke up I think it was around 11 am. It  was friday morning and that damn sun was bright. Wayne was up and already dressed so I had to hurry up and do the same. I was starving I'd driven all the way down to Pensacola from Athens,AL and forgot to eat. I didn't eat last night either when I was drinking all that crap. I like white russians but they start to taste too sweet after awhile. They can make you sick if you aren't careful. Wayne had gotten this blingin Lincoln SUV from that rental place and I wasn't going to have to drive anywhere down there. I always hate driving when I don't know where shit is I feel like an idiot. Plus since I'm not concentrating on the road I can spend that time pointing at other people and saying things like,"look at that idiot they must not know where shit is down here."
   Stepping out onto the third floor I could see the ocean. It was beautiful I never get tired of looking at it. I was going to have to walk across the road and take a walk on the beach while the sun was still out. There's just something about the ocean that made me feel at peace. A deep peace not one of those shallow ones I swear the view made the whole drive worthwhile I could party at home. Well, then again I couldn't right now because everything was destroyed and what wasn't destroyed didn't have any power anyway.

           Photo taken by me from the back of The Docks bar during the daytime while drinking some Bushwhackers

    We hopped in the Lincoln and headed to some place pretty much looked like a school lunch line. The setup looked bad but the food was supposedly really good. I know I got a couple sausage biscuits and some hash browns. Think I got some eggs too. The point is I ate alot and went back for seconds I was really hungry. I got to talking to Wayne to figure out the plan. Wayne always had a plan he had more game than game. He wasn't going to be down there just to sit in a hotel room he was there to do some damage. That was right up my alley.  He said he was thinking about heading over to Perdido Key he had a friend there that had been asking him to come to the grand opening of their bar. Apparently they were opening a bar across the road from Florabama. I'd never been to Florabama either and it was kind of famous. They had this thing there every year called "The Mullet Toss." Apparently a mullet is a fish and Florabama is right on the state line between Alabama and Florida. People take these fish and stand on one side of that line and see how far they can throw it into the next state and the winner gets something. Other than the satisfaction of being the most redneck mother fucker in two states I don't know what that something would be but I was pretty sure I was going to enter that contest one of these days just for the hell of it.
    We finished eating and went over to the boardwalk and walked around. We didn't care anything about going into any of the bars we just wanted to look at all the half naked women hanging out. Sometimes they were hanging out literally which was more of a plus. We left there to take something to his daughter who goes to college down there then headed back for the hotel. It had been pretty hot outside and I was still feeling a little tired so I laid the seat all the way back and just closed my eyes for a moment as we drove down the highway. That's when I started to feel it and a sense of doom came over my body. It had been awhile since I felt it but I recognized it. There was no use fighting it I was on the edge of something epic and it was going too happen.
   I smiled and opened my eyes and looked over at Wayne and calmly said,"Hey Wayne I'm about to blow chunks big time." He replied,"Are you fucking serious?" I smiled and turned my head to the right and leaned over and opened the door. I could here him in some kind of panic but wasn't paying too much attention. I blew like a volcano it was as epic as I thought it would be and more. Hit part of the door frame though which I was trying to avoid. The best part of it all was that we were in the left lane. Yes that's right folks blowing chunks into traffic on a friday morning on the highway at about 60mph. I could here the horns blowing and people cursing. It was hard to vomit and laugh at the same time but I was going for it. Wayne was struggling to change lanes. Later someone one ask me if I hit any cars to which I fondly replied,"My friend, I hit many many cars." I didn't know any of these people fuck them I was aiming for grills. I fucked up more grills than Mike Tyson all the while thinking how good those hash browns tasted coming up too. I got to enjoy breakfast twice and the second time was free. You gotta love a good deal.
   Eventually Wayne got the lanes changed and the eruption stopped. He made the brilliant observation that my head was stronger than my arms because I blew right through my fingers. I was a mess and the SUV was going to need a washing. He found a gas station with an outdoor bathroom and I cleaned as best I could first the SUV with handi-wipes then myself in the bathroom. I wasn't actually clean but I was functional to walk around. Next we found a car wash down the road and sent the SUV through immediately. Of course I paid for it I mean if you do the crime you do the time right? Plus playing Spy Hunter on the highway with my mouth was worth paying the $30. Then we went back to the hotel the lady downstairs that washed all the bedsheets and stuff would wash your clothes too if you tipped her well so I changed clothes and took mine down. Then worked on my laptop for a few while they got done. Wayne said screw it and took a nap.

Spy Hunter by Sunsoft

was kinda like this cept in a car and it was me

   While Wayne was out I walked across the road to the beach. It was packed there was something big going on there that weekend but I wasn't sure what it was I noticed Sandshakers was already packed when I came out of the hotel. I managed to find a spot though that didn't have that many people. I took my shoes off and let the sand get between my toes and picked it up with my hands. I felt a cool breeze come up out of nowhere and smiled. I felt really good and relaxed. I'd been stressed out for awhile and I always felt better coming down here or even going to the lake for that matter. I just sat there in the sand for a little while. Then the phone rang it was Wayne his friend Steve had called again and we were going to head over to Perdido Key for that bar opening. I headed over there and my pants were done so I grabbed those and paid the lady and off we went.

How could you not love being in this place it's heaven on earth

    We got lost a few times but we had plenty of time it was still pretty early it was only around 4 pm. As we pulled into Perdido Key we started looking for Florabama because Steve said this place was across the road from it. Must have been on a small peninsula because both sides of the road had an ocean view.  I kept looking at the condos as we drove passed. This area was the best I quietly promised myself someday I'm going to have one off those condos. I was going to have my peace away from all the drama I had to deal with in my life and all the shit back home.

Check out those condos on the beach

    

    We found Florabama and sure enough Happy Harbor was across the road kind of off in some gravel. We found a parking spot and walked over. Wayne recognized Steve's girlfriend and introduced me. A very pretty lady and seemed really nice. She was outside with two other badass girls selling crawfish plates.  Wayne had never had crawfish before but I'd ate it over a Shrevport a few years earlier and I liked it as long as it was spicy. I'm all about the spicy stuff. The girls got him to try one and he couldn't admit he liked it because it was looking at him. You wouldn't believe this plate you got for 10 bucks. You got this whole thing full of fresh crawfish( they were boiling them alive literally right beside us they were that fresh). You also got the corn cooked in the crab boil and this huge ass connecuh sausage. I got a plate and since I was friends with Wayne they gave it to me for free. I told ya the man has cred. About that time Steve pulled up. I'd heard about Steve and what a great guy he was Steve was a WWE wrestler he did the house shows. Wrestled in Japan and all that stuff. He gets out of this convertible with his hair in a ponytail and no shirt wearing a surrong and flip flops. Yes you read that right he was wearing a surrong. He was also about 6'5 and was pretty much built like a WWE wrestler with no bodyfat.  Pretty intimidating dude I mean I'm not a small guy but he made me look like Tatu off fantasy island. Wayne was right though he was a really cool guy couldn't have been a nicer dude. He gave us a tour of the bar man it was kick ass. There was a dock on back where people just pulled up in boats and came in there were girls sitting up and the bar drinking wearing two piece thongs. If i hadn't already thought I was in heaven I would have thought it now. Shit when I die I want to go to this place. We sat around and I picked Steve's brain a little bit I used to watch wrestling and had to ask about some of my favorites wonder who was really a dickhead and who wasn't. I was happy learn Steve Austin was just a down to earth good ol boy from Texas. I used to love to watch that guy I want to slam a beer and whoop somebody's ass just thinking about it. Since it was just across the road we walked over to Florabama it cost $10 to get in and the beer was way overpriced. We walked through it with Steve and it was cool. Still had a bunch of half naked women and a band playing on every floor. It was ok but I actually think I liked Happy Harbor better I enjoyed the more laid back vibe there. We walked back over there. Steve wanted to party but we couldn't drive back to Pensacola drunk so we were looking for a hotel in the area so we could just stay there. Steve had told us if he knew ahead of time he could've got us one of those condos for free but this was a spur of the moment thing. Wayne said he was up for it but I have a feeling Steve knew better. We were going to go to the hotel in Pensacola and get our stuff and come back. That was the plan until we got back to the SUV. There I found out what Steve already figured. We weren't coming back it was too far to drive and there wasn't a hotel close enough.

    We hadn't seen Janelle over at the Docks anyway and I'd hate to be down there and not see how she was doing. we got her a plate to go and went over there when we got back to the hotel. I honestly don't know how the Docks stays open there's hardly ever anyone in there. I chose not to drink that night I just wasn't in the mood for it after playing Spy Hunter on the highway but I think I may have had one or two bushwhackers. There were a few of the regulars in there it bothered me because they were smoking but the restaurant was open air so it wasn't as bad as Sandshakers where you just had to breath it. I think we left around 1 am and walked over to the hotel it was a pretty eventful day.
    The next morning Wayne's power was on back in Hartselle so I wouldn't get to stay the weekend I hated to leave but that was my free room so I didn't have much of a choice. He was going to go to Columbus,GA for a night but I wasn't feeling it. We followed each other on the interstate then separated at Montgomery when I kept going north. The drive back was pretty uneventful I mostly listened to the cd player it was dead in the middle of the day and I tend to think better at night. I had alot of things on my plate with upcoming seminars and other opportunities. I felt like I had the means to get where I needed and now I had a goal set. I was going to have one of those condos. Not because of the status but because of the location and the peace of mind with all those great people. They had what they wanted they didn't have to prove shit to anybody. This gave me my direction.
     I wondered what I was driving into back home the storms did alot of damage. Would there still be the carnage I left? I made it home about about 6 hours on the road and stopped by my parents first. Things seemed to be getting back to normal I called and found out the WiFi was back on at the apartment so I went over there. I think I just sat around watching the news on saturday and sunday. I saw where President Obama came down and toured the disaster areas. FEMA had set up a location in town and people weren't fighting for gas as bad. I just felt like I was on the verge of something and I still have that feeling like something is just barely out of my reach. I saw on the internet where Knuckleheads over in huntsville was open on the patio only. I have no idea how because that whole county was still out of power from when the nuclear plant took a direct hit. They said they had wings too. I thought about going the Sunday but said screw it and just sat around and thought a little more. The next day I saw the same thing on facebook and I was tired of sitting so I got in the car and took off. On the way I past by the church I went to as a child it was the church where I was baptized. It was a pile of planks completely wiped off the face of the earth there was nothing left everything was destroyed. As I got into Madison police were still out directing traffic because the lights still didn't work.
If nothing worked how the hell was this place open? I got there and I could see people on the patio drinking. I walked inside and it was nothing but darkness they didn't have power at all. However what they did have was alot of ice and cold beer in it. Somehow they were making wings and fries but not sure how they were doing it. Cold beer is cold beer and that was good enough for me. Life gave them lemons and they made lemonade. They had something they wanted to do bad enough and they came up with a way to do it. They had a patio full of people and only one waitress. Stefanie came in to work on her birthday. Working on your birthday sucks but when you want to make money a night with no competition is good too. It was a beautiful monday as I looked out over the highway finally coming back down to earth. I picked up that cold beer and took a sip as I laid back in my seat. Then I knew everything was going to be alright.